I went to lunch with my mom today, as her Mother's Day present was me paying for lunch instead of her, for once. She liked it.
While we were eating, we were discussing my relationship, which is sort of a favorite topic for the two of us. Moreso her than me, but it's all good. Either way, we were discussing the whole phenomenon of "knowing"--ie., how can you be sure that this is really the person you want to spend the rest of your life with?
Caveat--I've largely kept the relationship off of this, for good reason, but this seems as good a time as any to briefly break that relative silence.
Back to where we were--how do you just know? At what point do you stop asking "Is this it?" I realized, and Mom confirmed, that point may never occur. I may never meet someone and think "Now that's what I've been waiting for." She gave me an interesting exercise too--think of all of my guy friends, including the married ones, and try to picture myself with them. Is it any better than Indie Rocker?
Hell,no. I think I'd practically strangle most of them.
I had another interesting realization as well. Thanks to a childhood love for such classics as "Dirty Dancing" and "Ever After," I had kind of conditioned myself for something huge, big gestures, over-the-top Hollywood madness. I realized that the kind of guys who tend to make those big gestures tend to be the kind of guys who are incredibly high-maintenance in the rest of their lives.
I now realize that huge gestures look totally different. They look like a pair of Prada shoes and they look like surfboards and they look like really nice dinners for no apparent reason.
And I realize that the small gestures like saying "Hey, cutie" when I get home from work is what really matters.
This is in no way a harbinger of things to come, but just a realization that for once in my life, it's maybe not how I pictured it, and that's really OK.
Quote of the Day: "Then let's say God puts two people on Earth and they are lucky enough to find one another. But one of them gets hit by lightning. Well then what? Is that it? Or, perchance, you meet someone new and marry all over again. Is that the lady you're supposed to be with or was it the first? And if so, when the two of them were walking side by side were they both the one for you and you just happened to meet the first one first or, was the second one supposed to be first? And is everything just chance or are some things meant to be?" Henry (Dougray Scott), Ever After.